Expressing love and gratitude to those in my family celebrating wedding anniversaries within the next couple weeks with these anniversary funnies. Always keep laughter alive in your marriage.
A husband and wife were coming up on their 56th wedding anniversary. Knowing his wife loved antiques, Dan bought a beautiful old brass oil lamp for her. When she unwrapped it, a genie appeared. He thanked them and gave each of them one wish. The wife wished for an all-expenses paid, first class, around the world cruise with her husband. Shazam! Instantly she was presented with tickets for the entire journey, plus expensive side trips, dinners, shopping, etc. The husband, however, jokingly wished he had a female companion who was 30 years younger. Shazam! Instantly he turned 93 years old.
On their 30th wedding anniversary and during the banquet celebrating it, David was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration. “Tell us David, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with Angie?” David responded, “Well, I’ve learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, meekness, forbearance, self-restraint, forgiveness — and a great many other qualities you wouldn’t have needed if you’d stayed single.”
Jacson and Valerie are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 15th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public-address system, the Captain announces, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!” Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane landed safely on the island. An hour later Jacson turns to Valerie and asks, “Valerie, did we pay our $5,000 PBS pledge check yet?” “No, sweetheart,” she responds. Jacson, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, “Valerie, did we pay our American Express card yet?” “Oh, no! I’m sorry. I forgot to send the check,” she says. “One last thing, Valerie. Did you remember to send checks for the Visa and MasterCard this month?” he asks. “Oh, forgive me, Jacson,” begged Valerie. “I didn’t send that one, either.” Jacson grabbed her and gave her the biggest kiss in 15 years. Valerie pulled away and asked him, “What was that for?” Jacson answered, “They’ll find us!”